#HumansCare | From Isolation to Independence, Sadhona’s Story
Sadhona is from Bangladesh and cares for her daughter Sikha, who has cerebral palsy.
When Sadhona’s family realised that Sikha had cerebral palsy, they could not accept her, saw only her disability and could not see her as a human being. Sikha’s father even blamed Sadhona for their daughter’s disability.
All this, unsurprisingly, had an adverse effect on Sadhona’s mental and physical state and she became isolated, too anxious to leave the house with her daughter. The family were also struggling financially so Sadhona was not able to arrange therapy for Sikha or buy nutritious food for the family.
When our local charity partner in Bangladesh, Centre for Disability in Development (CDD), went to Sadhona’s home to talk to her about our Carers Project, she was very surprised that they were there to talk to her about her issues, but she was keen to hear more and be involved.
Sadhona had felt isolated for so long that she felt that no one liked or cared for her and her daughter. CDD staff that visited her were deeply moved when she told them,
"Until today, no one has called my daughter by her name. You are the first to do so. Everyone else refers to my daughter as a negative word related to her disability.”
Sadhona was also surprised that CDD team members called her ‘Didi’, which in Bengali, means ‘elder sister’ and is a term of respect and affection.
“When I understood that my daughter couldn’t live a normal life, I was emotionally broken. No one supported me in my family. But when I joined the Carers Group my eyes started to see the dream about my daughter. Now I believe that my daughter will have a future.”
Sadhona has benefited from counseling through Barefoot Counsellors who have been trained as part of our Carers Project.
She has also received training in cow and goat rearing, and with a loan from her Carers Group to get her started, she is now financially independent.
She started by purchasing two goats, and after a year she had 8 and was able to sell some of them and repay the initial loan. She combined her profit with some of her own money and was able to buy a cow.
She now has 13 goats and her cow has a calf. She sells 7-8 liters of cow's milk per day and has plans to have a dairy farm in future. Sadhona has also taught Shikha how to take care of the cows and goats, so that Shikha will be able to continue to earn money in this way when Sadhona is no longer there to care for her.
Before working with CDD, Sadhona was isolated and anxious. She didn’t feel that she could go out by herself and felt constantly worried. She says
“Before I joined the Carers Project, I didn’t believe in myself. Now I know that I am not a burden to society, I can also do something for society. The Carers Project has given me that courage.”
Sikha’s older sister said:
“Everybody thought that my sister could not do anything, but my mother believed that my sister could do something and she’s trying to do her best for my sister. She is the best mother for her child.”
The relationships Sadhona has built through the Rajarghat Carers Group have also proved a vital source of strength for her. She is an active member of the group, encouraging others to attend and occasionally running the meetings herself.
Her relationship with the other members of her group is so important to her. They help each other with any problems and Sadhona now realizes that she is not alone in the challenges she faces. She has people she can confide in, talk to and who are, ultimately, on her side.
Over time, Sadhona and her wider family have come to understand the concept of unpaid carers and the fact that they also need to be supported, as well as the person they are caring for.
As a result of CDD visiting Sadhona and enrolling her into our Carers Project, the attitude of the people around her has changed, her family and community no longer look down on her and Sikha. Now they are valued members of both the family and the community.
If you would like to help us continue our work supporting unpaid carers like Sadhona, then please do consider giving a gift. Every contribution, no matter the size, truly makes a difference.
